Nothing, they were pair-o-normal investigators. While most of them were pretty bland, there were a bunch of them with some really cheesy puns, and over a few years I built quite a collection. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Comet. That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. What was the vampire hunters' meeting about? He's gone crazy and now he's hitting everyone with a bat, but I gotta say-he is very polite.". Son, when I was your age there was no social media. tl;dr My dad's sense of humor appalls me. Details are sketchy. 2. A physicist, an engineer and a statistician go on a hunting trip. 4.Who puts money under Bambi's pillow when his teeth fall out? I lost a patient today.". What would happen if Apple bought a deer? What did the hunters eat while hunting for a deer? 24. 44. 41. Haunted French pancakes give me the crpes. One of them turns to the other and says. Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?". I hope there's no pop quiz. Why do deer cross the road? 32. Whether you need to break up the monotony of a action-less morning in the treestand, cheer up a buddy who missed all day, or break the ice with someone inexperienced with hunters, here are 10 deer hunting jokes. 26. Who did Bambi invite to his birthday party? How do you organize an outer space party? The most important type of deer for graphic designers is a-doe-be illustrator. This happened to him more times than he could count. That morning he shot a good sized 14-point buck! To open its act, the deer comedian says to the audience: "This joke is going to sleigh you all. It's a clever wordplay that combines the phrase "no idea" with the word "deer." upvote downvote report The father replied, "Sorry, I have no I-deer. Many hunters just want a quick buck. He wanted a million bucks. Where do reindeer love to be taken by Santa for a treat? Teach a Nigerian to phish and he'll become a prince. 35. What do you feed deer that have a stomach ache? 37. I'm not looking for any sympathy here, dad's die all the time. Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes. What did the big stag deer say to the hunter? And if theyre reindeer? Maybe youre more of a fisherman? It's terrible. So, I realize this isn't entirely in the spirit of dad jokes, but I think you all will get a groan or three in the end Basically, my dad is the epitome of /r/dadjokes. They see a deer in a clearing. I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. Does everyone in the North Pole think Santas reindeer are a great team. When they're done, they jump back into the bucket.". What was wrong with the deer's smile? A Hippo is really heavy, but a Zippo is a little lighter. The h. This is a joke my grandfather used to tell. Finally, they came up with a fool. Buck-gammon. 50. What cafe did hunters open years ago that has become crowded since then? Stag-azines! "Yes, I fired three shots up into the air every hour on the hour, until I ran out of arrows. All rights reserved. By joining Kidadl you agree to Kidadls Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and consent to receiving marketing communications from Kidadl. Unique up on it! Bless their heart. Weve got a whole zoo of jokes about owls, giraffes, dogs, and so many more. Whats the favorite ornament for reindeer to hang on their Christmas tree? Deer Hunting Jokes One Liners Among all living things on the planet, deer are the only ones that have antlers. Theres a new type of broom out, its sweeping the nation. Aviation jokes, Flying jokes, Pilot jokes, Airplane jokes Christmas Jokes Corona virus jokes (Covid - 19), Coronavirus Why did the hunter not know what he was hunting? Why doesnt Santa put reindeer milk in his morning coffee? COPY JOKE By: Freyja ( 0) ( 0) What cheesy dip do deer love to eat? The hunter replied, "Up until now I didn'tbelieve in 1,000-pound deer either. 2. More . Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? A deer hunter got on his hands and knees to take a closer at some tracks. 21. Beer nuts cost $1.50 per pound, deer nuts are always under a buck. Here's one that I thought of that's really bad that you could try and improve: Q: Why does Hunting call itself the lightning? 42. I see maybe one joke per week on here that she would understand. They see a giant buck in the woods. Based on his immediate delivery, and his wife's reaction, I just know this joke's been repeated often, to everyone's delight, as any good dad joke should be. Goofy Jokes for Adults Keep several of these classic old phrases on hand: Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No, no! Bonus HERE'S A TURKEY HUNTING JOKE WE CAN ALL UNDERSTAND. What kind of sight allows you to see deer behind you? We hope you love our recommendations for products and services! Through its deer stand. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. It was too deer. No one likes going to the dentist, so why not share some comic relief with these short and funny dentist and teeth jokes next time you're in the waiting room? Sour doe. While watching a deer eating a banana out of a car. He has shared the stage with over 100 show biz icons, from Sinatra to Willie Nelson and. 46. Reindeer. 25. We recommend that these ideas are used as inspiration, that ideas are undertaken with appropriate adult supervision, and that each adult uses their own discretion and knowledge of their children to consider the safety and suitability. Most take Elka seltzer. He drove the bear away in his car. Shame on him for trying to make a quick buck. Stuffed deer. This does not influence our choices. One evening, while still deep. What was written on the hunting board? I feel like a million bucks!. He hunts with his bear hands. What do you call a deer with perfect vision? said the other. I laughed my ass off for about 20 minutes. 30. How do you get inside a hunter's house? 45. Our family's sense of humor is what gets us all through. Why did the scientist put the deer in his cloning machine? It is so beautiful here. One of the hunters found an anvil next to the hole and threw it down. What did the hunter do with the fish in Chernobyl? When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble. Clearly, it's dead, and as it flipped over my car, a lot of its blood gets onto my windshield. I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize. Why were the Indians in America first? His deerest friends. "Poor hunter!". On the first night, Tom drops a ten point buck and they go ahead and cut it open to make some deer stew and beans. 12. 13. They wanted to know about the town's stake-holders. What did the hunter receive on his birthday? What was the cost of hunting at the zoo? The second hunter said, "Yeah, right about where our plane went down last year.". A half straw of semen from one of these freak bucks can sell for more than $10,000, a well bred doe can bring $20,000 and a breeder buck can go for $50,000 or more. She said people were making the joke "I hope you got the deer's insurance! And casually walked away. Man says "Sure, it won't happen". Caught me off guard so early in the morn. "Did you do what I said?" Where do reindeer go when their tail falls off? What do you call a deer with no eyes? He had a calen-deer to take care of that. You Don't Know Shit. Deer Jokes What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? ", I said "Maybe they're from New Hampshire if they didn't have insurance. I'll try to credit you or this sub or something. Why did the cookie cry? The second one said, No way, those are totally duck tracks. Then the third one said, Nuh-uh those are Then they all got hit by a train. After the deer finishedand was paying, the cashier said, "We don't see too many deer around here." Sure enough, after a while the drunk wakes up, heads to the outhouse, and pushes the door.". Are you up for some deer-licious dinner? " Click click click. I don't know y." "How does the moon cut his hair?" "Eclipse it." Want to hear a joke about paper? I said, "Well, you are in a wheelchair.". Because all they carry are bucks. Even though it might seem a bit strange, there are a bunch of funny deer puns and jokes out there. They ate sour-doe bread. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? As I ran up to retrieve it, my neighbor met me there. Hunter games. The deer smashes its head into the left car's headlight and it flips over to the right (over my car). We present to you a list of funny jokes on deer hunting and deer hunting humor that will make you laugh out loud. **Bonus jokes included**, Two Deer walk out of a gay bar. I'm not going in deer. One day, while hunting, a kid asked his father what the name of the deer that lost both of his eyes was? They are tall, stealth, and very fast. Deer Puns My deer daughter, I write to you Deerly beloved. I did a theatrical performance on puns. I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems. What's a deer's favourite type of cheese? She asked him what was wrong with it and Daniel said Well its rough, and its tough, and it doesnt take any shit off of Indians.. If you think these jokes are deer-larious, we've got loads more funny animal jokes for you to have a giggle at. Share them with us on our Facebook page! Deer (cheer) up man, it's not the end of the world. I was once bitten by a rabid female deer. Why did the duck hunter get free food in the restaurant? What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees? 47. Dad: (relentless attempts to evoke wrong answers from audience). I need to step my game up before i lose my throne. Dad: What do you call a deer with no eyes? As they eat the kids keep asking what it is theyre eating. Joke #13443. Ground beef. ?, The squirrel said, Well, I was taking a dump and after the bear finished his, he took me and tried to wipe his butt, but then he saw I wasnt toilet paper and threw me right out of the window., A few days later, the whole toilet got messed up: the fixtures smashed, the toilet broken and bloodied, the window broken, the door scratched, etc. What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? Who did the deer invite to her birthday party? Rude-olph. I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" I'm wondering if you guys could please help me? A fucking mad lib on the Pythagorean theorem. We also link to other websites, but are not responsible for their content. The second hunter replies, "That's nothing - I've been lost for days!". The statistician claps and says, We got him!. 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